Change a Child’s Life: Be a Role Model

(Post by MARILYN PRICE-MITCHELL)

Natalie, age 18, described her role model as a person with “a clear sense of what is important to her, putting forth the effort to improve and create things that will make a difference.” When Samira, also 18, feels “lazy, tired, or just plain annoyed,” she thinks of her role model and “is motivated to start working again.”

Natalie and Samira were part of my research study on how young people develop the skills, abilities, and motivation to become engaged citizens. They and 42 other college students recalled stories of their childhoods and adolescence and the kinds of people who inspired them.

Role models come into young people’s lives in a variety of ways. They are educators, civic leaders, mothers, fathers, clergy, peers, and ordinary people encountered in everyday life. This study showed than being a role model is not constrained to those with fancy titles or personal wealth.  In fact, students were quick to state that “a true role model is not the person with the best job title, the most responsibility, or the greatest fame to his or her name.” Anyone can inspire a child to achieve their potential in life.

The top five qualities of role models described by students in the study are listed below. These qualities were woven through hundreds of stories and life experiences that helped children form a vision for their own futures. By far, the greatest attribute of a role model is an ability to inspire others.

Passion and Ability to Inspire

Role models show passion for their work and have the capacity to infect others with their passion. Speaking of several of his teachers, one student said, “They’re so dedicated to teaching students and helping students and empowering students. That is such a meaningful gesture. They are always trying to give back to the next generation. That really inspires me.”

Clear Set of Values

Role models live their values in the world. Children admire people who act in ways that support their beliefs.  It helps them understand how their own values are part of who they are and how they might seek fulfilling roles as adults. For example, students spoke of many people who supported causes from education to poverty to the environment.  Role models helped these students understand the underlying values that motivated people to become advocates for social change and innovation.

Commitment to Community

Role models are other-focused as opposed to self-focused. They are usually active in their communities, freely giving of the time and talents to benefit people. Students admired people who served on local boards, reached out to neighbors in need, voted, and were active members of community organizations.

Selflessness and Acceptance of Others

Related to the idea that role models show a commitment to their communities, students also admired people for their selflessness and acceptance of others who were different from them.  One student spoke of her father, saying “He never saw social barriers. He saw people’s needs and acted on them, no matter what their background or circumstances. He was never afraid to get his hands dirty. His lifestyle was a type of service. My father taught me to serve.”

Ability to Overcome Obstacles

Young people develop the skills and abilities of initiative when they learn to overcome obstacles.  Not surprisingly, they admire people who show them that success is possible.  One student shared a story of a young man she met in Cambodia on a service-learning project with her school. “He is an incredibly hardworking individual who has faced unimaginable obstacles in his life, yet continues to persevere to support his family and encourage his community. He survived the Cambodian genocide. He earned his education in a system where those who succeed are the ones who bribe officials. He has dedicated his life to give back to his community. Wow! What an individual; and the best civic role model!”

Research studies have long shown a correlation between role models and higher levels of civic engagement in young people. Positive role models are also linked to self-efficacy, the ability to believe in ourselves. In fact, the young people in my study admitted that unless they learned to believe in themselves, they would not have been capable of believing they could make a difference in the world!

Children develop as the result of many experiences and relationships. Role models play an important role in inspiring kids to learn, overcome obstacles, and understand that positive values can be lived each day. Whether you are a parent, grandparent, aunt, uncle, teacher, civic leader, clergy member, sports coach, after-school program leader, or a person who just happens into a child’s life, you have the ability to inspire!

Marilyn Price-Mitchell, Ph.D., Bainbridge Island, Washington, USA

Marilyn is a developmental psychologist, educator, researcher, and writer with a passion for learning how today’s youth grow into healthy, successful, and engaged adults.  She synthesizes multidisciplinary research in psychology, education, sociology, child & adolescent development, social psychology, and neurobiology to bring trusted, evidence-based research to parents, teachers, mentors, coaches, and all those who support kids. Visit her blog at Roots of Action; Twitter; Facebook.

©2011 Marilyn Price-Mitchell. All Rights Reserved. Please contact for permission to reprint.

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(5) Readers Comments

  1. A very well written and informative article that does a wonderful job of explaining the significant role that adults can play in shaping a child’s future.

  2. Marilyn’s article is a wonderful reminder to me of my importance as a mentor to the all the young people in my life.

    I appreciate her research based approach to clarifying how young people thrive. Her insights are invaluable.

    • Ellen,
      I appreciate you taking the time to comment on this post and glad to know it reminds people how important it is to be a member to young people.

  3. This article is both very moving and very positive.

    It is not all about “teaching”. If we do not inspire a child, we have not done our job.

    And inspiring is so much more difficult. Yet, it is not hard.

    As you say correctly: “Anyone can inspire a child to achieve his potential in life!”

    This is a big challenge for all of us, thanks for reminding us.

    Food for thought – for Read Aloud Dad tonight.

    Thank you so much.

    Read Aloud Dad